12 years of math in my life (maybe even more) and it's over.

and you know what? it didn't go out with a bang. today's paper was DISGUSTINGLY HORRIBLE. and this just confirms my sentiments. i hate math. i hate it. it can go to hell for all i care. socrates and russell and all those other pathetic matheticians can just DIE 232987098723 times over again, okay? if there is something i'd want to erase - it would be math. Lacuna Inc erases devastating relationships right? so there it is, my tumultuous and self-destructive relationship with math should be erased. so i can never recognize any number again. how cool is that? do you think the world would be a better place without numbers? i think so. but then man would think up new ways of how to measure wealth and etc etc. so maybe it wouldn't make a difference to the world at large.

please forgive me if i sound very bitter. i was incredibly sick yesterday. i had a high fever (for the first time in 454398709837598 years, i'm serious) and i also threw up everything i ate (also a first in 349870987349587 years) including the medicine and thus had to suffer two injections. it is by God's grace that my body is more recovered today, but i can't say the same for my emotional wellbeing.

i'm feeling terrible. my parents, clearly, think i'm the worst person to ever walk this earth. nothing i do is ever, ever going to satisfy them. why why why am i here God? i don't understand, and the ambiguity and uncertainty is slowly driving me insane.

+ posted by M @ 12:27 PM